Parent Guide: Finding a Therapist for my Teen in Los Angeles
When You Reach the Breaking Point
Finding the right therapist can be hard, especially when you’re dealing with a teen actively struggling with their mental health. There’s a flurry of emotions and an urgency to find solutions. Here are some things you might be thinking, feeling, and seeing in your teen that might signal a need to reach out for a therapist’s help.
What You Think
“I don’t know what else to do.”
”I’ve tried everything and nothing is working.”
”My teen needs help, but I don’t know where to start.”
“How can I trust therapy will help?”
What You Feel
“I'm shut out. My teen won’t talk to me.”
“I’m worried about my teen’s future.”
”I’m exhausted trying to keep up with what my teen needs.”
What You See
“My teen is lashing out or acting out.”
”My teen can’t sleep.”
“My teen is struggling with anxiety and/or sadness/depression.”
“My teen doesn’t have any good friends.”
“My teen is getting bullied.”
“My teen has no motivation.”
”My teen’s grades are slipping and/or they are missing school.”
FAQs for Parents about Teen Therapy
With all these thoughts, feelings, and observations going on, it can be hard to think straight and find answers. Here are some common questions and answers that parents have in the process of finding a therapist for their teen.
Q: What will the therapist tell me about my teen’s therapy?
A: The therapist will keep you updated on how your teen is engaging or not engaging in the process of therapy. The therapist will inform you if your teen is a danger to themselves (or others) and that danger has reached a level requiring a higher level of care.
Q: What won’t the therapist tell me about my teen’s therapy?
A: The therapist will not reveal any specific content discussed in session, unless it involves danger to your teen or your teen endangering someone else. This is to protect the teen’s confidentiality and allows your teen to establish a trusted relationship where they can openly express themselves without any judgement or worry about how it will impact their family dynamic. Being able to speak openly and freely and be seen and heard is a key healing element of therapy.
Q: What if my teen doesn’t want to go to therapy?
A: This is a real possibility, but involving them in the decision process, including choosing their therapist, can greatly help.
Q: What if my teen blames me in therapy?
A: Blame is a coping mechanism. Therapy can help a teen work through blame and work towards accountability.
Q: How am I going to pay for therapy?
A: There are two primary ways to pay for therapy. One is through insurance, which helps cover the cost but requires documentation in your teen’s health record of a diagnosis and finding a therapist in-network or submitting super bills with an out-of-network therapist. The second is through private pay, where you pay the therapist directly. While private pay is typically more expensive, it doesn’t include reporting diagnoses to insurance. Private pay also often includes a limited number of sliding scale slots that have lower fees dependent on income in an effort to make therapy more inclusive and accessible.
Q: How do I find a good therapist for my teen?
A: Do an online search using Google or a therapist directory such as Psychology Today. Ask around, especially asking your family doctor. Look for a therapist who specializes in working with teens. Ultimately, finding the right fit can be a process of interviewing several and seeing who your teen feels comfortable with.
Q: What can I expect out of therapy for my teen?
A: It varies and depends on how much your teen engages in the process, but commonly teens start to improve their self-confidence, develop coping skills, increase emotional expression and regulation, reduce conflict and acting out behavior, and find more joy and ease in their life.